Saturday, January 29, 2011
My co-worker... he has a Nissan Murano SUV with AWD. Our snowstorm was Wednesday into Thursday, I've been able to get to work in my FWD 9 year old Toyota and he couldn't get to our job on Friday.
Ha ha ha! His new name is wimp! Yes, I am enjoying this too much! I do have to say it was easier to work without him. One less person on the trailer and I didn't have to waste my time double-checking his work. What am I supposed to just do it all when he is there? To think he has been doing PET/CT exams years more than I. Each time we work together, I see more and more why the guy who trained me said I picked up things so fast. I am far from perfect but I pick things up fast... especially the easy stuff.
Peace, love, hugs and more big weekly snow storms! ;) meryl
PS: We all know February is the bigger snow month, right?
My birthday is February 7. Family tradition is to have a family dinner for birthdays; my dad’s present to the person of honor. You get to choose the place, then we work out the date. Sounds fun, simple... not in my family, or at least for me.
I do my best to pick a place that has at least two dishes that each person can choose from. My mom and one sister have dairy issues (so do I for that matter) Dad is… you can never please him. I pick places where he can get the dishes he always orders, always make sure they are on the menu. (I don’t eat seafood. Others pick seafood only places, hmm!) I try to pick a place located closer to all of them since there is only one of me. I feel I go more than out of my way to please, to accommodate them. Wait, this is for my birthday? Why don't I get the same treatment?
Scheduling is the only part that should be difficult. It’s accounting season so we usually celebrate end of February or in March, fine; sis and her hubby are CPAs, can’t be avoided, I get that. The other sis takes a lot of vacations. When I work Fridays I always get stuck late so that is my only bad night right now.
Now it is my birthday, I am supposed to pick the place *I* want to go to, end of story, that is the “rule”, it is what everyone else gets to do.
In the past I picked a steak place for my annual delicious steak; I eat very little red meat and when I do, I want it to be good. It's one of the few places dad would eat everything on the menu! Has chicken, steak, lamb, veal... This place has great fries, other sides and chocolate mousse pudding: complaints from family it’s too expensive, too far away. A) Steak places are expensive. We are being served huge pieces of very good meat and huge side dish servings. B) Restaurant is closer to me but by all main highways. At most a 40 minute trip for the furthest person.
After a work luncheon, I chose a nice Italian place closer to them. They have more than a few non-cheese dishes and my dad’s standard only things he will order Italian plus seafood dishes he likes. I order the same chicken dish, it is so delish, and the red potatoes with it are great, cooked perfect every time. The desserts, most made in house, are sooo good! Love their tiramisu. Don’t know if it is traditional or not but it tastes great and I get that great rum/espresso buzz from it, sis loves the cannolis. They have a few really great chocolate desserts as well (I hope to introduce K to). Sis and I went there for lunch one time and ordered two desserts: one to eat there and one to bring home! After going there two times for my birthday and for numerous other celebrations and luncheons, sis told me she always gets ill after eating there. I was surprised since I am the one with the sensitive stomach. So we don’t go there anymore, a totally reasonable request; I have no problem with that, disappointed but no problem.
Two birthdays ago, I re-found a Japanese restaurant I love that we used to frequent at one of my jobs; they have great food, something for everyone, dad’s standard sukiyaki, and the best ginger salad dressing ever! Everyone loves the food. The place is a bit of a trip for me, but so worth the ginger salad. Last year all I hear is complaints about the parking. They have a small lot but lots of parking on the street.
It’s the stupid stress. It’s boils my blood. Something that is supposed to be my celebration, my evening, something to put a smile on my face and be fun turns into the worst evening ever.
I have had my fill, more than my fill, I am sick of it. Why do I have to deal with complaints when I do my best to accommodate everyone else? Why is it OK for dad and one sister to pick a seafood place when they know I do not eat seafood but a place I pick with great food that everyone likes is taboo? They do not get why it angers and frustrates me so. Guess I should pick Tavern on the Green: far away and expensive and that would be ok? I guess I have always been too nice, too accommodating and they expect me to give in to everything. No more, well not exactly.
This year giving it one more shot. I now know after my conversation with mom, it will be the last family dinner for my birthday. I will just take myself to my Japanese or another place, and celebrate with Madison and Maverick and one day to celebrate mine and K’s birthday, when he is up to it.
My Email to my Sisters and their significant others:
“Since it's always such a, I don’t know controversy, hard time... whatever you want to call it, to have my family birthday dinner at the restaurant of my choice, I am giving 1 more shot at pleasing everyone.
Please excuse my sarcasm, losing my PET/CT job (happy birthday to me) at end of February has me angry & frustrated; love that job!
I have decided 2 try cold cuts & Fireside/Zorn’s chicken & fries at the rents (not relaxing but...) You all arrange the date thru mom with your vacations, accounting plans, etc. My bad night would be the Fridays I work: 2/11 & 2/25 since I always get stuck there. If I'm lucky I'll get the other Fridays *fingers crossed*
PS: not telling the ‘rents bout the job thing yet. I cannot handle the stress. Have a few things in the works but cannot deal with dad's degradation. Then telling me I had a great "attitude change" when the permanent hours finally came thru WTF?!
Kim bought us lunch 4 getting 2 the office today; <>
J feel better & don’t work too hard & ask Kim about her gift from us.
M don't work too hard.
K & K another warm vacation I'm sure, where's my ticket? ; ) Enjoy! E too if she's going.
Been up since 4, need 2 be up at 5:30 I think. Warm, sweet dreams :) meryl
...via iPod touch”
One Sister replies:
“Sorry to hear about the job. Fingers crossed that something opens up very soon.
We are free Friday, Feb. 11th, Sat. Feb. 12th, Sunday, and Feb. 13th, Sunday, Feb. 20th. Let us know what you land on.”
Other sister replies:
“Mom and I were discussing days. Sat and Sun nights are good for us. Karen’s weekends below work for me. Mom will follow up when she decides what day she wants. She was talking about the same weekends.”
What is that I have highlighted in red? Yes, it is MY birthday! True I did tell them to work out the scheduling on their own but that line shows what I have known for some time, it isn’t my birthday after all. So I really can stay 25 like K says :)
Of course, ultimately it is all my fault... I try!
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Note: a stupid person has NOTHING to do with "book smart", has to do with respect, common sense, listening, and (maybe more important than listening) hearing.
Definition: smart person - a) person who uses their brain, thinks, listens, hears, uses common sense. They treat others as they would like to be treated; b) person who knows there’s something to be learned from everyone, good & bad; c) person who enjoys learning something new everyday from anyone.
Note: a smart person will not belittle you, degrade you, talk down to you or treat you like a child. They will treat you with respect, they will not force their views onto you. If they disagree with you they will not tell you how to think, they will discuss it rationally, not have a heated discussion, listen to and respect your ideas, even understand your point of view, which may change their view, maybe not. Any discussion will be intelligent and respectful always.
I do not discuss politics or religion with most people. Too many tempers flare, too many people think their way is the only way, or they are trying to save you; think the middle ages and the Crusades? We are all human beings sharing the same planet, continent, country…town. We should all treat each other and our individual ideas and beliefs with courtesy, smiles, and manners common sense, duh?
If you encounter a stupid person who degrades, belittles and/or treats you like a piece of shit, concentrate on that issue and that issue alone, NOT what they told you was wrong. No matter what “issue” instigated them into mistreating you, they are looking for something to supplement their superiority complex, do not help them “get taller”. Be proud by giving yourself the satisfaction that you took the high road, treated them with respect, and did the right thing. These people do not respect themselves. If they did, we wouldn’t be having this discussion.
I believe I am too nice. Been thinking a lot lately that I should try to be more of a bitch, maybe that is why this week happened, to show me I am doing the right thing? I respect people, give them half a brain to start off with; may need to downgrade to one third after this week. When people push me too far, such as a sales person not understanding after FOUR TIMES no I do not want to buy anything, no I do not need to buy anything, no meant NO the first time I said it, THEN they experience my wraith, tactful but... I’ve been told after story number one below, I am not a person to be messed with… OK.
When I first finished college I worked at a major company as a computer programmer/analyst/technical specialist/network supervisor and I ran the email system. During a service call, a male engineering technician told a stupid joke which made me turn my eyes, give him my “what the fuck” are you serious look, and see all the other engineers leer at this technician; Engineering had 100% male employees in it. Wish I could remember his first name. Let’s call him Dave for the story.
The more I thought about this, the more it bothered me. I knew if I went to my VP Victor and told him about Dave’s “joke”, Victor would rip out Dave’s eye socket (both of them) and probably give him a free sex change operation. I dealt with the Engineering VP Joe on a regular basis, so I decided to speak to Joe directly. I kept it very professional, adult... (remember I am a kid!)
I called Joe and asked if I could stop by to talk about something privately. Joe apologized, thanked me for coming to him (I didn’t tell him about the Victor part) and told me he would take care of the situation. Later that day “joke” teller Dave, stopped by my desk to apologize. Dave sounded very genuine, polite, and respectful; I accepted his apology. Then Dave proceeded to explain to me why I should have liked the joke… THAT is an example of a stupid person.
I went back to Joe, told him Dave gave me a heart felt apology, Joe smiled. Then I told Joe that Dave then proceeded to tell me why I should have gotten and/or enjoyed the joke, smile disappeared, he started to turn pale.
One more story when I was at same company, same job… My room was in the basement of my parent’s house and it was my birthday. Walking down to my room I had a fresh cup of hot tea in one hand and the phone in the other talking to a friend, wishing me a happy birthday. The stupid carpet pieces my dad put onto the steps, second to last step came loose when I stepped on it, tea and phone went flying. Because of my height, my butt bounced down at least half the staircase, bouncing on each step, my tea spilled all over everything! The phone and mug made it to the basement floor shortly followed by me. VERY PAINFUL!!!
I was considered an executive (first job out of college!!!) hence I was required to wear a suit everyday. I was in so much pain, I wore very appropriate looking black leggings, blouse, black jacket and comfortable, flat, black leather booties; I looked very professional and I could walk around for the most part. As soon as I got to the office, I told my supervisor and Victor what had happened and they both told me to do what I had to do to take care of myself, heal and feel better. As long as my bosses are happy, that is all that matters. So glad they understood but I knew they would (smart people).
Later that day leaving the ladies room one of the managers, Joann, who was part of our group, caught a glimpse of me. Joann called me over to where she was chatting with another co-worker. Joann: “why are you wearing *looks me up and down then with sarcasm* pants?”. I stopped, looked Joann straight in the eye, totally deadpan: “I fell down stairs last night”. Her mouth fell to the ground, she did not even ask if I was OK... I went back to my desk, and almost fell off my chair laughing. I enjoyed THAT too much BUT I did not treat her with any disrespect, she attempted to belittle and degrade me with her self appointed superiority, ready to throw the book at me, get me in trouble, and she ended up tripping herself up.
The lessons I have learned from dealing with stupid, disrespectful, self-righteous people. Just throw the facts right back at them respectfully, do not stoop to their level. If it is yesterday’s issue, deal with the disrespect only. You can never win but you can keep your dignity and your own self-respect and isn’t that what is most important, knowing YOU handled the situation correctly with dignity and respect?
Take care, peace, hugs, love Meryl (and hopefully no stupid people :)